Female Mice Given a “Male” Sex Drive Through Creative Brain Surgery
Scientists announced this experiment, in which female mice had some little thingie in their brains disabled (perfectly safe, I’m sure) and the female mice went sexually apeshit*. The females then exhibited “male” behaviors — mounting them, asking for their numbers, saying things like, “Baby, are your legs tired? Because you were scurrying through my dreams all night!” The horror. The horror.
Forget the meteor, global warming, nuclear war. This could be it. The end of industry, society, civilization. If women suddenly became as available for sex as men wish they were, we’d all be dead in a month. An awesome, awesome month.
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*Hey, that’s what the scientist said**, ok?
**Well…I bet he was thinking it.
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Italian Mother takes away her 61 Year Old Son’s Allowance
Look, ladies, this guy is not our fault. When he decided to live with his mom until he was 61, he didn’t clear it with anyone, ok?
He lives in Sicily with his mom, he’s 61. Sigh. Come on, dude. His mom took away his allowance* and brought him down to the police station because he didn’t respect her. Also causing trouble was the fact that he didn’t like her cooking. His own mom’s cooking? In Italy I’m pretty sure that carries the death penalty https://www.explara.com/e/how-to-date-at-craigslist
Ladies, beware the man who mooches off of his mom** — you can bet that he’s going to be looking for the same arrangement with you. Well, either that or he’ll be running the Bates Motel.
*How does your 150 year old mother have money and you don’t? What happened, did you forget to get a job for 61 years? Does being crippled by loserdom qualify as a disability in Italy?
**I mean, don’t worry about THIS guy. I think his chances were all gone in, oh let’s be generous and say the day he turned 30 and still got an allowance from his mom — in 19 freaking 76.
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Well, that does it for this week at Manslations.com. Thanks so much for stopping by — this has been the biggest week so far for traffic! Keep it coming, people.
Tell your friends. Tell your enemies. Tell people to whom you are indifferent. Comment. Send in Manslations Requests. And I will see you all right back here on Monday with more!
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