The Foreigner - Of the Bri’ish variety

I met The Foreigner at Holly’s, a.k.a “Santa Monica beach girls & boys gone wild”, when The Foreigner (Bri’ish, to be exact) in front of me asks me to dance with him. I agreed only because he had been cracking me up dancing like a crazy fool for the last 5 minutes. This guy was NOT afraid of embarrassing himself. I even let him get away with the common and obviously trying to get laid “It’s my birthday tonight!” line. Just as an aside, does that really work for guys? Do girls really give it up thinking, “Well hey, it IS his birthday after all. Let me give him a little something. Wouldn’t want him to have a bad birthday.”


But I digress. Back to the matter at hand. We dance for a little while longer, then I go to the bathroom, where my roommate tells me to “Talk to him more! Act like you like him.” Apparently I had been too aloof. But my roommate is a genius in matters of the dating nature, so I listen to her. When we got back though, he was nowhere to be seen.
Fifteen minutes later my roommate and I leave and The Foreigner is outside smoking a cigarette, a habit the British apparently start at birth. I say “Good night, Happy Birthday”, and am about to be on my merry little way. Here’s the conversation that ensues:

The Foreigner:     Whoa!!! Hold up!!! Where are you guys going now?
Yours truly:         Beechwood, a little bar in Venice.
The Foreigner:     Well I LIVE in Venice!!
Me:                    Okayyyyyy
The Foreigner:     Your friend is REALLY hot by the way.
Me:                     Uhhhhh, thank you?
The Foreigner:     You know, my girlfriend is modeling back in London. I just wanted to tell you because I don’t want to give you the wrong impression.
Me:                     (once again) Okayyyyyyyyyyyy. Well, bye?
The Foreigner:      I really liked talking to you. Seriously. I hope that I see you again.


What is this NONSENSE?!!?? Sweet jesus. Can somebody please break it down for me? I mean, it wasn’t like I was coming on to this guy, or according to my roommate, even acting like I was interested. He made all the moves, and then proceeded to dis me like I was the one trying to talk to him!

Pure rubbish, if you ask me. Cheers, carry on then. Carry on like that preferably far, far away from me. I really don’t need that. The whole experience gave me the distinct impression that I had just been rejected from a job that I didn’t even know I had applied for.

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