She Got A Call From Her Ex’s Pal?
A reader named Tatum broke up with her ex about a year ago. And a funny thing started happening a few months ago. Not funny ha-ha, per se. Or funny strange, really. But it happened, though. Oh, it happened.
Ahem. One of her ex’s best friends started texting. As “friends.” What is this all about? Well, let’s get started. I’ve got one eyebrow raised, Spock-style, in anticipation of something…”fascinating.”
Hi Jeff. First of all, I love your book. All those situations are funny because they’re true. Second, I’ll start by saying that it’s been a year since my boyfriend of 8 months broke up with me. I’ve recovered from the drama. Well, a few months back, I received a text message from one of his best friends. It was strange because his friends didn’t have my number. Well, he asked how I was doing, and eventually asked me out. He insisted that we’d be “just friends.” I said, “Thanks, but that’s not a good idea.” Afterward, he was saying that I could do better than my ex. Was he trying to say, “You could have me, instead”? Although I hate the ex, I wouldn’t do THAT to him. So out of curiosity, what was his friend actually saying? Once again, the ex’s friends didn’t have my number.
Dear Tatum,
Well…hm…let’s see. What did this man do, eh?
- Many months after his pal broke up with you, he somehow located your phone number.
- Asked you out.
- Said you could do better than his FRIEND who you used to date.
There is no question in my mind, this guy is asking you out. The whole, “It’d just be as friends,” thing is…
Well, I’ll quote Seinfeld, when he was talking about some woman wanting to be “friends.”
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“Who wants a friend?”
Come the eff on, Tatum. You know this guy is interested. Why else on EARTH would he have done actual work to contact you after all these months? Trust me, your friend skills just aren’t that highly in demand.
Could it be that he merely always wanted to DO you when you were with Sir Ex-ley? Sure. Totally. All I’m saying is, he ain’t just idly saying “hi.”
WOULDN’T DO WHAT TO WHO?
What puzzles me is your reaction. That you wouldn’t “do that” to your ex. You know, the guy you haven’t been dating in a YEAR. I mean…how would going on a date with this guy be a betrayal of a guy who DUMPED you?
I’m not saying that it might not bother the guy. I’m sure it will. But…er…who cares? He’s yesterday’s news. A whole year has gone by. The guy can’t expect to have an immortal lock on your hiney forever, can he?
No. Say “no” to hiney-locks, Tatum. If you like the guy, go out and see what happens. Again, we don’t know how deep his interest goes, but we know it isn’t just casual.
Ever had an ex’s pal look you up, ladies? How did it go?
Ever had an ex’s pal look you up, ladies? How did it go?
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